Usually, I make a revelation and something happens. This time was no different; it was a classic sucker punch that left me feeling unsafe and on edge. While reading at Mockingbird about David Foster Wallace’s short story of The Very Bad Thing which was, in fact, depression of the clinical variety, I realized that when [...]
Archive for the ‘depression’ Category
Usually something happens
Posted in anxiety, cutting, depression, hope, writers on 01/25/2010 | 2 Comments »
Discipline
Posted in cutting, depression, self-injury, working it on 01/13/2010 | 11 Comments »
I soak in the happy news of the day, both big and small, joys mine & just nearby to me. The boys can take the bus home from school this winter. Theo and I do not have to brave the cold, the busy parking lot, the ice, the tears. We stay home and bake things, [...]
Push/Pull
Posted in Advent, Christmas, depression, holidays on 12/11/2009 | 20 Comments »
Merry Christmas, All. I do love Christmas. I love Christmas lights and music. I love Advent, the somber yet joyful waiting for a savior, a baby, a miracle. My birthday is upcoming. It adds to our family festivities. Only a handful of times in my life have I felt the “December birthday gyp” that many [...]
Passages
Posted in anniversaries and dates, depression, grief, my girls, progress on 05/02/2009 | 16 Comments »
It has been nearly 7 months since this episode of depression has started. I am feeling, generally, better. I am not cured. I have an enormous amount of spiritual and emotional work to do. I am not free from the ghosts that haunt me, yet. Yet. That yet is my clue, that I am, in [...]
The things come back around
Posted in depression, meme on 01/30/2009 | 15 Comments »
Around the dawn of time – when I last posted in November – I was tagged with the familiar 6 Random Things meme, by Veronica. I should have just done it then & there, but the thing about depression is that, it hardly ever turns out that way. I have been 100% in favor of [...]
just a dreamer
Posted in depression, dream on 11/14/2008 | 20 Comments »
So, almost a month has passed since I sank into this depressing, depressive episode. The days are foggy inside & outside of my brain. I walk through, going through the motions, not always sure what day of the week it is when I first open my eyes and remember that I am still depressed. I [...]
When the clouds roll in
Posted in change, delays, depression, faith, fear, honesty, hunger, loss, me, missing pieces, nothingness, taking flight on 10/28/2008 | 18 Comments »
More than anything else my children enjoy water play in the summer time. It is hands on, creative, messy and fun. The only source of stress to visit us on those hot summer days was under the spigot. The water source was a precious commodity. The boys vied for control over it, even while I [...]
my brain – your Monday Mission Charity Post
Posted in depression, holidays, monday missions on 11/19/2007 | 10 Comments »
In a quiet corner of New England there is a brain suffering from: mild seasonal affected disordersomewhat typical holiday blues (brought on early by the early Thanksgiving Holiday and accompanying marketing schemes)financial stressacute anxiety over world affairscoming down off the high of pushing through the red tape and getting help for second child (otherwise interpreted [...]
But Jesus is in Your Heart!!! and Other Words of Comfort
Posted in comments, cutting, depression, kid antics, kindness on 01/15/2010 | 5 Comments »
Remember the part where I was doing the “not talking”to Matt and the girlfriends? Well, that turned out to be less true yesterday than on other days. I did do some talking with Matt, with the girlfriends, with some people from my new church, which is a lot for one day and one blog post. [...]
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